


Scribbled words (I may tell you one day about)

by Shadowdianne



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: F/F, Mentions of Hook, mentions of Hood
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-21
Updated: 2016-03-21
Packaged: 2018-05-28 03:34:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,642
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6313774
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shadowdianne/pseuds/Shadowdianne
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>They knew in the same way Regina knew Emma would confide in her, they knew in dozen different ways that made this whole thing almost ridiculous.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Scribbled words (I may tell you one day about)

**Author's Note:**

> a/n So… uhm. I don’t really have words for last night’s episode. I really don’t. So I will go with this instead. A comment will be very much appreciated!

The hot, humid air of Hell breezed between the crumbling gravestones. The poor reddish shadow a weak tree provided not enough for Emma to open her eyes completely, narrowed pupils focused on the three stones in front of her, the letters still as clear as the first moment the little group of eight has seen them.

It had been just a few hours after the revelation, bitter taste still on the roof of her mouth as she eyed the names, tongue peeking between thin lips, wetting them as she changed the weight of her body from one foot to the other, arms still tightly crossed around her body. Just like she had been for the last hour and a half.

“They aren’t going to disappear just because you keep looking at them” She heard and the words made her almost smile, a tired grimace the only thing she was able to provide as she turned, her head tilted to one side as Regina stood in front of her, hands clasped in front of her body, the same strange smirk adorning her eyes. Perhaps hers a little more tired.

The blonde didn’t answer to that, not knowing what exactly she was supposed to say. A common occurrence for her these days.

“We can’t really do much more, can we?” She asked, turning her back once again at Regina, the names of the gravestones calling for her, her name like a magnet she didn’t quite wanted to know for what kind of her asked as she caressed the perfectly carved letters, her index finger stopping on the second “m” of her name for a millisecond before starting again.

At her back Regina sighed and walked towards her, stopping herself just a few meters away from the blonde woman, one hand raising in the air for a moment, a mimic from what the younger woman was still doing, a tired look on her eyes as she traced her surname, her hand falling limply at her side as the last curve of the N was traced.

“I still don’t understand” The blonde murmured, making Regina open her mouth for a second before shaking her head, remaining silent.

“Hades knows the power we have”

It was a noncommittal answer, one Regina thought about very carefully before voicing it, the words feeling heavy on her mouth. Just like everything she had been trying ever since Emma was swallowed by the vortex in the middle of Storybrooke, pained green eyes the last thing she had seen. Green eyes that were now looking at her, curiosity and dread mixed on them.

“Power?”

The brunette shrugged, unsure of what else to say.

“Everything is about power” The former queen replied, hours of lectures from her mother coming back to her. “No matter what form that takes”

“Like my heart” The blonde deadpanned and Regina founded herself trying to say something against that but her words laid flat and so did her voice.

“Like many other things” She finally replied and there was a somber look on her eyes the green-eyed woman didn’t dare to ask about.

They could talk though, about secrets and sacrifices and things they had given up for the other. Like Emma’s first step into insanity just because Regina didn’t dare to lose Robin. Or like Regina’s first taste of darkness after fighting against it with just Henry first and Emma second at her side during that battle. The brunette digits still tingled from the spell she had been almost ready to preform and it didn’t matter how deep she repeated that she was doing it for Emma, the demons she had once welcomed inside of her were now drowning her on their promises of blood and loathing. Which was absurd and still.

Still the idea of splitting a heart, another, was something that made her nauseous, that made her dreed, that made her tired, tired of curses and magic that sided up with colors and factions that weren’t so clear anymore. Not that she had ever have them clear either way.

“I’m going to find a way” Emma said, waking Regina up from her reverie, her face flushed, her eyes glinting feverishly and the brunette found herself thinking on when had been the last time she had seen Emma sleep. She couldn’t quite remember “A way to save y… to save all of you”

It was meant to be a whisper but Regina still heard it and silence stretched, breeze changing, quieting down, a lonely leaf floating in the air in front of Regina’s name.

Emma moved, picking up the leaf in mid-air and not daring to look at the older woman as she let the leaf move away from their, apparently, soon-to be-graves. A sigh escaping her throat as she did so.

“I need to find a way” She repeated, darkly this time, her voice low, almost a growl. One that had Regina sighing on her own as she looked at the leaf, its reddish color blending with the sky above the two of them.

“You don’t”

The blonde stared at Regina, pupils changing once again, from narrow to dilated, magic writing with tendrils spells the older brunette had long ago allowed herself to forget about. Emma let out a laugh, one that made the former queen to almost shudder as the hollowness of it touched her face, a cold caress that had her taking a step towards Emma, the blonde’s arms as tight as ever around her own midriff.

“If not me who? I’m the savior”

And they both knew the fallacy on her words but neither of them said anything about it, Regina deciding on keep staring at Emma, remembering the short, brisk talk she had had with Robin the moment she had realized that Emma had go back to the graveyard, worried looks shared between both Snow and Charming as the silhouette of the younger woman got lost on the midst that seemed to surround the town.

And Emma didn’t seem frantic anymore, not as she stood in front of Regina, feet firmly planted on the grass at her feet, arms crossed, chin raised in one last sign of defiance. But Regina could still see the captured scream on those green eyes and so she waited.

“You are not responsible” She finally said, letting her voice lower slightly as she talked, her eyes conveying the details she would want to say instead. “For what happened”

The blonde stilled, head angled almost comically as she eyed her. And there was pain and sorrow and something close to panic and Regina let those words circle her for a second, words she had once know intimately bursting out from Emma’s sole stance.

“Who was then?”

The brunette found herself unable to answer to that question, words filled with anger and tiredness and something close to resignation, rejection perhaps, shame coloring the last syllable.

“I was the one who turned dark” Emma continued, her voice rising with every word, with every letter, breaking as she tried to breathe. “I was the one who turned Ho.. .Killian dark, I was the one who couldn’t save him, who couldn’t save his soul. I was the one who stabbed him”

“Saving our lives, our son’s life from what surely could have been a very different trip to the underworld in the process”

The words hurt as much as they burnt the older woman’s lips and Regina almost winced, knowing how low was using Henry at that point but still remembering vividly the second she had though they were about to die. Emma’s final decision filling her with hope and strength, strength that had been the one responsible for her to take a step towards her when the blonde had asked for their help. Hope dying the very same second the blonde’s will of going to Hell was out.

The blonde fell silent, looking once again at the gravestone and wincing at the sight of Snow’s name, her green eyes falling to the red-tinted dirt between her feet, unable to look up again. Not until Regina took a step closer, her own boots barely making any sound on the silent graveyard.

“I need to get you out” The blonde finally said, a whisper, a sob. “I need to get you out, after everything I’ve done… I…”

There were sobs and tears that at first Emma pretended not to cry but after her voice broke she dropped any pretense, green irises turning almost blue, a quiver on her upper lip making Regina think about Henry in ways they almost were painful. Almost.

“You are not responsible” She repeated but she felt empty, tired, unsure of what else to say.

They were silent until Emma’s sobs subsided, her voice low and broken when she at first tried to talk “I was angry at you for asking me to save Robin”

The admission didn’t take Regina by surprise, she however looked up at Emma, the blonde now sporting a tired, a “barely-there”, smile which ghosted upon her face.

“I was angry because I knew why you were asking such a thing and…”

“Dark magic can make all of us want things that we…” Regina started but Emma laughed at that, the feeble attempt of the brunette not even registering on her own mind anymore.

“You don’t want to split my heart, do you?”

The question was soft and easy, a question another Emma Swan, the one Regina had known ever since she opened her door and there had been a woman claiming to be the mother of her son, would say with a smirk and a cocky stance. This Emma Swan did it with slumped shoulders and still a defiant look on her eyes, not daring to look away, not yet at least.

And Regina knew that the answer for that was as easy as why she had tried to find an answer for her own need to reinforce something she had felt dead.

“I want you to be happy” She finally replied and her eyes were focused on her name, on the mocking way the letters seemed to look at her. “If you will be happy with only a part of your heart I will help”

It was said with a snarl she really didn’t feel but was appropriate and the former queen almost thought she had managed to trick the younger woman. Almost.

Unfortunately for her Emma always knew when she was lying.

“I didn’t want to save Robin” The blonde admitted, not answering to Regina’s words, strangely aloof as she talked, her right hand playing with the hem of the shirt she wore under her jacket, blonde hair slightly curled as she moved her shoulder, making Regina think about those first years in where everything had been far more easier, far more… just them. “When he was bleeding. I didn’t want to.”

“Emma”

And that’s the warning, one Emma should follow but didn’t.

“I did it though, and darkness asked for the price you will be paying for it”

“The fury” Regina mussed and the blonde shrugged, closing her eyes and rubbing the eyelids tiredly, looking like a child all over again, a teenager Regina felt close to, far too close.

“I didn’t let it have the price, not in Camelot and yet when it appeared… I didn’t know how to feel”

“I’m not blaming you for that one” Regina carefully stated, hands itching, her magic writing inside of her admissions she had never thought about and yet it had been there ever since the beginning, feelings she thought she had revoked.

“You should” The blonde answered simply and Regina bit back a protest, knowing, feeling, that Emma would never admit anything different that guilt. “But the easiest thing had always been hate, right?”

And was almost a plea now, the voice soft and tender and scared and Regina wanted nothing but to laugh at that because no, the easiest thing for the two of them hadn’t been loathing. Which hadn’t been difficult either but that’s another path she is not open to share nor think about.

Their shared silence went for far longer they both had intended, their eyes moving away after that, unsure of what else to do as Regina coughed, her pupils going to the corner of the graveyard in where she knew Daniel rested. More or less at least.

_“You will always be my first love”_

And there were the ties that she had seen on her wrists the very same day Tink pointed out a tattoo she had long ago forgotten about its existence, and there are words she had loathed the day she realized that Emma had indeed caved to the advances of someone who was lower, who will always be lower.

“I will help you” She finally said, tiredness settling, eyelids feeling heavy, unrested, as she eyed Emma, hands finally reaching for her, touch a millimeter away, one they both never did quite move. “With your pirate”

It was said with such a finality even Regina winced, Emma stiffening at her side.

“Please” Emma replied, but neither of them knew exactly what the blonde was asking for, nor who.

“He doesn’t deserve you” Regina added as in an afterthought and there were Emma’s eyes, the ones full of fury and brightness and fire and a myriad of things Regina always ended up not knowing how to call them but still present, far so present.

“Neither does Robin””

And it was true. But if Emma had helped her achieve her own happy ending getting her the pirate was the least Regina could do. And so she shrugged, not wanting to pick a fight, not that day.

“Do you?” She asked though, biting the tip of her traitorous tongue for that.

“Deserve you”? And those weren’t the rules they had been playing ever since Neverland, when Regina had given Emma her memories, her past and they had burned with too much need and want and care and Emma had known in that moment she would do anything to cross the town line and take Regina with her.

Regina didn’t ask, she didn’t need to and Emma’s breath felt hot against her cheek when the blonde bent, lips moving, grazing the skin and yet far too far, far too close.

“And you?”

And she shouldn’t, shouldn’t be doing that, shouldn’t be playing.

And Regina should never answer that, would never do such a thing because they…

But she turned and grabbed the jacket’s lapels, pushing herself against the blonde, curves and plains and scent she could become addicted to and kissed Emma, and again, and again.

And again.

Until her lips were bruised and she felt drowning herself on the younger woman’s mouth

“I won’t take your heart” She said and she swatted away any cheesy answer for Emma’s part with a glare, eliciting a nod from a dumbfounded blonde. “I won’t play that game”

“I know”

And they knew it, knew it in the same way they knew why they didn’t really talk about their supposedly perfect boyfriends, their happy endings written in things like fate and fairy dust. They knew in the same way they knew that the only magic that mattered was theirs and the only thing that mattered to Emma was Regina and Henry when everything was dark and twisted inside of her. They knew it in the same way Regina knew Emma would confide in her, they knew it in dozen different ways that made this whole thing almost ridiculous.

And so when Emma hugged Regina she just closed her eyes and kissed her again, lowering her mouth, touching her jawline, letting the blonde kiss her, words like “guilt”, like “fate” or “duty” floating away on that coppery colored sky.

 

 

 

 

_In a deeply hidden part of hell a god cried in anger._


End file.
